“A year has past as an editor. I have found the woman of my dreams. The most caring, selfless, innocent, beautiful and smartest person i have ever met, who supports of what i do for a living and helps me chase my dreams. She Just brings the best out of me. Pushing me to the limit to make my own team of three called Black Frames to shoot shortfilms and sketches. The best part of the year was the luck that i have been having. I own a Camera, an iMac and a Laptop with her help. She just is there for me and always supports me in what ever i do even with a bad start we had, but she still proves me that there is no one like her in this world that fits my jigsaw puzzle piece. And a year after, we are still together and in love like the first time we said our “i love yous”. Hoping for a better future for the both of us and our dreams of being the best ever Movie Maker and Doctor duo. As we will live happily ever after.” – Johariz M. Sani, Sept 5, 2013

So we didn’t live happily ever after. 2 years 9 months and 1 day we’re together. The last six months was filled with ups and downs the aftermath is unbearable. But you know what? It was a joyful ride. Instead of writing how bad the feeling is right now or proving a point, I want to honour this relationship as it should be. A tribute if you will.

I know the last phone call to her was mean and un-gentleman like. I stuttered when she said “What is the positives of this relationship?”. I couldn’t think of anything to say cause of my anger. But now I’m calmer and collected, I thought about. It was the best relationship I could wish for. We complimented each other, had fun together, and we live life like there’s no tomorrow. It was very present. It was very real.

What got me into liking her is the way she talks and listens to me. Eager and enthusiastic. Never a dull moment. Always talking, dreaming and planning of things to come. We are both ambitious and wanted bigger and better things in life. Wanting to prove people wrong with our wishful thinking. What we have in common is not that much but our universal liking to art, movies, music and travelling is always a moment I will never forget. The excitement of getting to see her even when we just saw each other just a few hours ago still made me into a giddy little boy on christmas morning. The giggles she makes when I’m being funny really gives a man the confidence he needs.

People around me are telling me to forget her but I don’t think I can. These memories of her is recent and also it’s too good to forget (Eternal Sunshine much?). I don’t want the memories, the knowledge, the happiness we’ve spent together. She gave me a lot more than me and her can think, and not a day goes by without me missing her, together or not. She made me who I am today. The better version of me.

We were made for each other she and I. She will still be dream partner I want to end up with. Just not right now. Here’s a toast for You and I. For a brighter future with or without one another. 🙂

P.S Thank You Amira Natasha. You will still be loved and never be forgotten.


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